Do I Believe?

"The moment one asks oneself 'Do I believe?' all belief seems to go. I think this is because one is trying to turn round and look at something which is there to be used and work from--trying to take out one's eyes instead of keeping them in the right place and seeing with them. I find that happens about other matters as well as faith. In my experience only very robust pleasures will stand the question, 'Am I really enjoying this?' Or attention--the moment I begin thinking about my attention (to a book or lecture) I have ipso facto ceased attending."
~C. S. Lewis